I Don't Mean To Be The Voice of Dissent, But...

Not sure when
she met me Dad.

My penultimate term of primary teaching was Spring 2011, as was the wedding of Kate 'n' Wills - aka the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge. When royal weddings and births are on the news, I find myself indifferent. (As I am to most things other people do, if they're not impinging on my life or ruining things for a minority - at least that's the aim.) The trouble was, as a teacher I was expected to be 'excited' and 'patriotic' and 'happy to dress up in red, white, and blue for a celebratory whole school picnic' which is where I found my limit. Now, I'm just relieved I don't have to teach a one sided view of the monarchy. I can respectfully opt out of this weekend's shenanigans, and use the time in my own way. And as I work for myself and set my own hours, it'll be business as usual. However, if you're a Union Jack waving, royal-family loving, pomp and circumstance sort of person who's thrilled to bits that the Queen has reached such a momentous landmark, then all power to you. Enjoy your street parties, your celebrations, and your bunting. Fair play and crack on with your fun.

FYI, my fave character
in Leeza McAuliffe
is Grandma, who I've
always pictured as a 
later-years Diana
Rigg. So here she is!

Writing News

My niece has finished Leeza McAuliffe Has Something To Say. And because she's my niece, I got to talk to her at length about what she thought. This is literally the best feeling. I could talk about my characters all day long as if they're real, yet in order to maintain an impression of sanity and non-self-absorbedness, I stop myself. Not this time though! I was given detailed feedback and a valid critique. It was ace.

Culture 

Miles Teller was great,
even though his job was to
cosplay Anthony Edwards.

So I saw Top Gun: Maverick - a sequel to a film I loved when I was twelve. I could write a dissertation on all the thoughts I had during the two hour, eleven minute Tom Cruise-athon, but I'll keep it brief. All I'll say is they sure spent a lot of money on what's essentially a TV movie. Maybe skip a fighter jet scene or two and spend some cash on the script? Develop the characters beyond two-dimensional cardboard cutouts? Explain to TC that he needn't be in every single scene? EVERY. SINGLE. SCENE*. Oooooh! Get me being snarky! I know, I know. I usually keep it positive on here. OK, I'll turn it around. It's certainly a seat-of-your pants cinematic experience. Miles Teller, as Goose's son, was fantastic. Every second reminded me of the (way better) original, and the music (mostly identical to the 1986 film) was a lovely nostalgic nod. But yeah. I still have a lot of thoughts. Don't worry. You'll only hear them if you urge me to expand on them at length.

Stone-baked, sort of!

Food and Drink

I had a big revelation on Monday: In order to replicate stone baked pizza, all you need to do is whack your raw dough and topping in the oven and frig it up as high as it'll go. It's my one life hack for you. This bad boy pictured, was baked on 245℃ for eight minutes and was delish. Note for next time: Use more passata! (Topping was parmesan, black olives, sun-dried tomatoes, goats cheese and rocket.)

Out and About

It's been a quiet one since last week's London jaunt. I've done my usual weekly things - brunch, Costa, cinema - but nothing on top. Oh, except to baby-sit my niece and neph for a day and a night, which involved a service station pick-up, a Burger King tea, a film night (thank you Enchanted for entertaining four people between 6 and 49) a trip to the park, and a bistro lunch. I will be recovering from lack of sleep and energy for the foreseeable. 

Reading this back, I feel I need to repeat, I'm a live and let live sort (although the caveat about not impinging on others' rights, remains. I'm not letting this sort of thing 'live', for example.) It's a free country and we all have our 'things'. Don't listen to me and my opinions, I can only speak for myself. So if you're madly flag-waving, loving the testosterone-fuelled jet film, or chilling out with whatever does it for you...

Have a lovely week, folks.

*I have not fact-checked this. But it certainly feels like it's true.

Not-Home Pleasures inc. the Best Dip in Christendom...

London Cooking GIF. 
By Rebecca Hendin.

Stop Press: I'm writing this from not-home. Exciting! Apart from some Welsh caravans and AirBnBs, this is my first jaunt since the Before Times. It's only London, not a round the world trip, but still. It's a break. A break I used to do regularly, like it was my second city, and yet now it's two years later and I'm gingerly walking past much-loved haunts and hoping they've survived. Some have, some haven't, but in my life, I love you more 🎶  Sorry, I came over all Lennon and McCartney there. You can take the girl out of Liverpool, but you can't take the... etc etc. I've spent the last few days eating lovely food, tubing it all over the show, and seeing some marvellous theatre and stuff. Despite the aches in my legs from more walking than I've done in ages, it's been lovely.  

Let's face it, this is my only
understanding of High School.

Writing News

The current worry/area of research I'm focusing on, is making the facts of Leeza's life authentic. I can write family drama and sibling banter without breaking a sweat. Piece of piss. But the details of a Year Seven's school life are less obvious. I keep asking friends with teens, what books they're reading. What texts do schools encourage these days? How much homework would she have? Also, is 'I'm crushing on X' a real phrase or is it a Netflix Americanism that's filtered into the teen stuff I'm watching. With the first book, Leeza's Y6 status was easy peasy. I had all the info at my finger tips to make it feel real - or an approximation of real. I'm always going to twist the facts to make it fit the story. But with my lack of modern day high school knowledge, it's harder. So that's where I'm at. High School Students:  If in the near future, our paths cross, prepare for a lot of random questions from a strangely interested but ultimately non-threatening writer-lady.

YES IT IS.

Culture

What's that? Can I share some cultural highlights of the week that aren't actually telly-based? Why, yes! Yes I can! On Friday night I saw Hamilton for the second time. God, I love that show. The first time, I knew nothing other than it was the latest hot ticket. The second time around, it took all my strength not to join in with every word. 🎶How does the bastard, orphan, son of a whore, and a Scotsman, dropped in the middle of a forgotten spot, in the Caribbean...🎶  Yeah, yeah, you get the gist. And then if that wasn't enough, I saw the Comedy Store Players last night. They've been going for years and I've seen them before, but communal laughing at funny people's antics really is pure therapy.

Clockwise from the left - 
halloumi with black honey, veggie plate,
  cracked olives, olive stones, hummus,
 falafel bites, and triple chilli labneh
 in the centre.

Food and Drink

I only knew it for its lockdown restaurant kits (my 43rd birthday tea thanks you) but on Thursday night I ate at Arabica in Borough Market. Their triple chilli labneh and veggie plate might be one of my favourite ever dippy meals. Throw in some hummus, grilled halloumi, falafel bites, and freshly baked, pillowy pita and I was in dippy-tea heaven.

Out and About

London. Catch up.

My legs really are aching now. When I get home later, I'll be spending the rest of the day in a seated position. May all our aches be passing and may triple chilli labneh (insert your own top dip here) sustain us in our endeavours.

Have a lovely week, folks.

The Circle of Life of it All...

Congrats Ukraine! You
threw everything at it.

As we take down the bunting and file away the score cards, all that's left to say is CONGRATULATIONS, UKRAINE. You thoroughly deserved a decent placing regardless of anything else, so I'm delighted the global stage had the chance to show solidarity and appreciation to the Kalush Orchestra. 

National treasure
status achieved.

But what about our boy, Sam? Wasn't he a stone cold legend on Saturday night?! If you're not singing 'I'm up in space, maaaaaaaan,' at the top of your lungs, several times an hour, there's something wrong with you. I'm still surfing the high of the whole shebang, but the crash is coming. It always does. Don't worry, it's a cyclical process every year. I've got this.

 

The beer garden where
the writing group
magic takes place.

Writing News

Leeza Book 2 is back on track. Wahey! I did a few big writing seshes throughout the week, as well as the scary thing I hate - sharing it with my writing group. I only printed out the first couple of pages - baby steps, people - but before I read it, I heavily caveatted it with, 'This is the first draft, it's not been edited yet, it mightn't make the cut, it's probably not interesting enough to grab new readers, blah, blah blah'. Yeah, you get the gist, right? Anyway, I cracked on, regardless. And in a very lovely turn of events, it got some laughs! It also sounded better when I said it out loud rather than mentally skimming it on the screen. So, yeah, that particular bridge has been crossed, and it felt good. Another cyclical process I've come to know well.

Heartstopper has my heart. End of.

Culture

FFS, isn't Eurovision enough? OK, I'll give you some more. The Staircase on Sky is the reenactment of the Netflix documentary of the same name from a few years ago, and it's as equally disturbing and gripping as that was. I'm still not over Heartstopper, even though I watched it two weeks ago. A second binge of that is in my near future. I've started reading Chris Brookmyre's, Places in the Darkness, which is reminding me of the Red Dwarf books of my teen years, (witty characters in space - no great leap) and after listening to the Comfort Blanket episode on Dawson's Creek, I'm trying to work out when I'll have time to start a rewatch of that. I LOVE a coming of age, high school, teen drama, so for now, I'm rewatching Sex Education, whilst being thrilled to bits with Ncuti Gatwa's new role. 

Eurovision salmon!

Food and Drink

Eurovision week means picky teas. Anything that can be eaten with one hand whilst the other is scoring, tweeting, or scrolling. The two semis were more low key, but for Saturday night, chilli, ginger, and garlic encrusted salmon was flaked over some blinis and served with natural yoghurt on a sharing platter. Later, when the scoring began and blood sugars were in danger of dropping, the cheese board was brought out. I don't know much, but I know how to Eurovision feed.

The Tom Wambsgans and
Mark Darcy mashup
we've been waiting for.

Out and About

Apart from the writing group, it was a stay-at-home week. Two semis and a final will do that to a woman. I did sneak in a cinema visit on Friday to watch Operation Mincemeat, but other than that, not so much.

These nails sparked a right 
interesting convo with
the postman.

I realise some people might still be flummoxed about why I love the ESC so much. That's OK. Liverpool Men's footy team played in a big match on Saturday that I'd heard some people talk about in the build up. Fair play to them, but if no one else had raised the issue, it'd have passed me by. As I'm typing this, the postman's just knocked with my latest eBay purchase and complimented my nails. I told him they were for Eurovision and he looked baffled. As I said to him just moments ago, 'You've got your planes and I've got Eurovision.' (It helps if you know he really likes planes.) And he accepted it, and then asked me loads of questions about Saturday. We all have a thing that brings us joy - sport, planes, international singing competitions... and in about eight months, the selection process for my thing will start all over again. Another cyclical process! It really is the circle of life. Congratulations once again to the winning Kalush Orchestra, and to Sam Ryder for his long-awaited second place. Bring on 2023!

Have a lovely week, folks.

Bring on the Eurovision!!!!

I'm still not used to the new bloke
so I'm letting Jon Ola keep his
eye on things for now.

Oh wow! Oh boy! It's arrived! The week that makes the other fifty-one worth enduring has finally started! From the first selections at the end of last year, through the January bleakness as countries got organised, to the promise of green shoots and bright weather as all eyes turn to Turin, we've made it; to this glorious day. For today is the dawn of our dreams. Today marks the start of - yes you've guessed it - EUROVISION WEEK!!!!!!!!!!

Me, casually referencing
 YouTube and TikTok like
it's nothing.

I won't lie, this feels amazing. All the excitement is still to come yet there's so much out there to whet our appetites. YouTube and TikTok have been all over it, but for anyone not up to speed, (and if you missed my interview on Riverside Radio on Saturday) here are the most basic of basics...

• Ukraine will do exceptionally well and perhaps even win. Everyone will be happy for them and it will be a moving and emotional global gesture of solidarity. Their song is pretty good, regardless.
• The UK probably won't live up to the huge (and very enjoyable) hype that they've created for the first time in years, but should do much better than usual. If the aim is to improve on last year's nul points result, then the only way is up. We've been drawn in the second half which is already a result and the rehearsals have gone really well. If, as I'm secretly hoping, we make it to the top ten, that'll be epic. I now think that's possible whereas as a couple of weeks ago I just wanted a point. Believe!
• My only other contender in terms of song is Sweden. If I were cheering on someone for purely musical purposes, it'd be them. Classic, does-what-it-says-on-the-tin, Eurovision banger. It could also win.

Good luck, Sam Ryder.
I'm enjoying the bookies
optimism but I'll be happy
with any points. And if we
make it to the left hand
side of the board?
Amazing!

Either way, it's all still to come. The semi finals are on Tuesday and Thursday, I'll be getting my nails done in a European flag homage in the week, and then Saturday's the big one. The champagne will be flowing and the prawn and salmon blinis platter will be picked at. Buckle up folks and enjoy the ride of your lives, it's going to be GLORIOUS.

 
Writing News

Lolz. No seriously. Lolz. A change in life circumstances (how dramatic! No actual drama, but the work hours of the person I live with have changed) has meant things are currently being recalibrated. I've written this blog, last week's blog, a shopping list, and an online feedback form. Monday morning, when everything returns to normal, will be very welcome. (Except I'll be battling Post Eurovision Depression. Booo.)

Damiano David, lead singer of
last year's winners, Måneskin.
I look forward to reuniting
with my future next husband
on Saturday.

Culture

What? You want more than a globally broadcast song contest involving forty countries and watched by over 180 million people? Get you. Oh all right then. If you must press me, I suppose I'd recommend The Split on BBCiPlayer - a family drama set around a law firm, like a more middle-class and monied This Life. And if you want to be hit over the head with high school nostalgia whilst being punched in the gut with all the feels, I am compelled to point you towards Netflix's Heartstopper. It's the sweetest, boy meets boy story, that provides the good messaging about growing up, whilst beautifully depicting young love and the angst of trying to work yourself out. Every single one of my boxes were ticked, and ticked hard.

Food and Drink

For reasons explained below, there've been a lot of chips in my recent eating past. And after that, there were a lot of vegetables to try and redress the balance. I made my own hummus so I could eat carrot batons and cucumber sticks without feeling too rabbity, and tried to avoid all forms of fried potato once the caravan holiday was over. (Spoiler: There was a caravan holiday.)

There's a lot of this
sort of thing in Wales.
Photo credit: Dom Bond.

Out and About

The Bank Holiday weekend saw a Bond family mini break (that makes it sound well classier) to a duo of caravans on the Cambrian Coast. Yes, I was back in Aberystwyth. The scene of many scenes from Assembling the Wingpeople. At one point, I drove my brothers and sister-in-law back from their cliff top walk whilst pointing out key locations from the novel. The chippy, the restaurant, the bar where the reunion takes place, and the bandstand on the beach where one of the characters has an 'incident'. They very kindly indulged me. Mainly because I was giving them a lift, I suppose. Beyond that, we got through the weekend and managed to avoid COVID, bad weather, and lost tempers physical fights. Well done, Us!

My insides, right this second.

But let's get back to business. Are we here? Are we braced? Are we ready for the wonder of it all? GOOD. Today, when I consider the mood icons in my peri-menopausal tracking app, I'll wholeheartedly select 'happy' and mean it - with gusto! Good luck Sam Ryder, good luck everybody. See you on the other side.  

Have a lovely week, folks.

The Comfort of a Faked Seminar

There's a new podcast that I'm obsessed with but its also reminded me how disappointing post-university life can be. 

Ah, the happy memories of blagging.

I have a love/hate relationship with my English degree. (Bear with me. It'll make sense soon enough.) It opened me up to a world of literature and gave me a decent overview of some of the classics - good for pub quizzes and crosswords if nothing else. The down side - because of course there's one - is that my overriding memory of uni is trying to speed-read a weighty tome every two weeks, but giving up half way through, and hoping the following day's seminar didn't focus too much on the end of the book. Three years later, I remember relishing with some relief that I never had to read again. Well done University!

 
Of course that lasted all of five minutes. After all my housemates departed for real life, I was alone in my student digs for a final weekend. In a moment of pity, a friend lent me a book to help ease my boredom. It was Jemima J by Jane Green. I gave it a brief look and next thing I knew, hours had passed and I'd finished it. Reading? I was back! It turns out I didn't want to quit books, just quit boring ones.

My post-college book list wasn't all contemporary beach reads, though. I spent the initial months working my way through EM Forster's novels. They were great. Howards End, A Room With a View, Maurice... Sure, they were also Merchant Ivory films so that helped bring them alive, but I still loved disappearing into the pages. But there was one thing missing. As I sat on the bus travelling to my first job, reading about Eleanor Lavish or Margaret Schlegel, there were no seminars the next day in which to discuss. No one wanted to know what I thought. I couldn't hear cleverer people than me's opinion about Forster's use of whatever. And that felt pretty flat. What's the point of reading if no one aids your understanding with their own takes? 

Me, whenever I finish a book.

Over the years, I've got over it. It's fine, no really. And as much as I urge people in my life to read books I've loved, they rarely do. I'm used to keeping my feelings to myself on the subject. But I've realised it explains something about me. 

There's nothing I love more than a good podcast. But more than that, I love the type of podcast that takes a cultural item - a TV episode, a film, a book - and dissects and debates it, pulling it apart and sharing the inner workings with clever people that respect it. And there are so many! 

Right now, I can't watch the new series of Taskmaster without following each episode with the companion podcast. It drops the second the show has finished. Then there's Firecrotch and Normcore. They recorded two episodes a week during the last series of Succession. Listening to their mad plot theories added an extra dollop of pleasure on top of the actual show. There's loads more I subscribe to. Shrine of Duty about Line of Duty, Always There about Howards' Way, Still Any Good? about old films, and The Columbo Podcast about, yes you've guessed it, Columbo. 

Last month, a new podcast started. Comfort Blanket. Its premise is simple - someone with thoughts to share, is invited to discuss a cultural item they consider comforting. Joel Morris, with 'older brother introducing you to cool new stuff' vibes, presides and is brilliant. Week one saw Rufus Jones giggling away with Joel as he talked about his love of Raiders of the Lost Ark. It's a film that was made slap bang in my formative years but I'd never seen it. I know. Weird huh? So after listening to their chat, I did just that. And then I re-listened to the episode now I knew what they were on about. The following week, Jude Rogers talked about the song, Freedom, by Wham. Now that was something I knew inside out, and had loved since I was six. Even so, the conversation was illuminating. An hour long chat about a specific song from thirty-eight years ago? It was fantastic and taught me so much. Cool, clever people talking about things I either love, or love to learn about. What a thrill! 

Everyone needs a
comfort blanket.

There have been two more episodes since then, about TV shows I've never seen. And that doesn't matter. The gently teased out social commentary that underpins the guests' choices, is enough to keep me listening. That, and their enthusiasm. It's been my regular Thursday treat for the past month regardless of the subject.

I know I said I was obsessed but don't worry - my podcast habit is under control. It just provides the backdrop for my car journeys and train rides really. But when you think about it, it's exactly what I was missing all those years ago. Joel Morris and the Comfort Blanket guests are the clever people in the seminar whose views I want to hear. The analysis of culture is detailed enough to satisfy my inner-nerd and celebratory enough to feed my soul with joy. And the upside of doing it this way? I don't have to blag that I've actually finished the novel. Win. 

Have a lovely week, folks.