Resolutely Clear About Resolutions...

At the time of writing, I'm in the final hours of 2020. There's nothing more to say about that, so I won't. But while I sit here, contemplating the life-improving resolutions I could make to herald the start of a new dawn, it's a fair bet that by the time this drops - in 4 days time - I'll have sacked them right off.

I've written about New Year's resolutions before. TLDR? Pointless. That's my stance and I'm sticking to it. I've made many plans, many promises, to myself over the years but very few have stuck. Never click on a Daily M**l link is one that's lasted. Never buy shoes I can't walk in, is another. But these are the exceptions. There have been hundreds of earnest decisions, made with the absolute bestest of intentions, that come to a stuttering halt around the twenty-somethingth of January. Don't blame me. It's what happens. It's science.

On a wholly related note, please click this link. It popped up on Twitter during 2020, and is a perfect - if not darkly hilarious - example as to why making idealistic plans in January, means bugger all when scuppered by world events. Did you click the link? If not, go back and do it now. It's one of few things that made me belly-laugh about the pandemic. It's good to laugh. Even about the bleakness. So... back to resolutions. As Robyn Schall (the woman in the vid) showed, there's literally no point making resolutions. No point at all. And yet... 

This seems reasonable to me.

This year, I have made a resolution. Yep, just now. The thing I've just spent three paragraphs slagging off and described as pointless, will now provide me with further paragraphs as I tout the alternative view. (This is how B***s Johnson started.) I'm not going to fall prey to my past mistakes though. There's no point grandly announcing I'm going to lose five stone or start running marathons, when both outcomes would depend on me making major lifestyle changes. Changes like no more horizontal weekends on the sofa, or suddenly having to start eating bananas. Those kinds of lifestyle changes. You can keep your bananas, your marathons, and your behaviour modification. None of that's welcome here. Instead, I'm keeping it real. I'm keeping it SMART. Need a refresher from that management course you did a million years ago? OK, here you go.

Something to leave until 2022.

SMART targets are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Timebound. So blithely insisting I'm going to eat healthily doesn't cut it. It doesn't specify how, doesn't explain what quantity of my diet must be healthy, doesn't feel achievable or realistic from my walking cheeseboard vantage point, and gives no indication for how long I should do it. So not so SMART at all, really.

How's this for a plan instead. I'm going to walk at least 5000 steps a day. 

Now, I know what you're thinking. BUT NICKY. 10,000 STEPS IS THE DAILY ADVISED MINIMUM AMOUNT. YOU'RE PLANNING TO DO HALF AS MUCH AS THEY RECOMMEND. To that, I reply 'good one,' with all the sarcasm I can muster. Yes, I KNOW it's not the full 10,000 as dictated by everyone's Fitbit, Apple Watch, and Garmin. (I assume the tech companies have got that figure from someone with more insight than their marketing teams.) But that's not the point. The point is, that most of the time, I do far less than that. Sitting with a laptop across my thighs for hours a day, really impedes how many steps I manage. Some days, when I throw in a food shop, I might reach the dizzying heights of 7532. Other days, when I crawl from my bed to the shower, and then sit tippy tapping away at the keys, I might make 2573 by night time. I'd have to move about, jig around, and up my game to make it to 5000, but it would be achievable. It would also be specific, measurable, realistic, and time-bound. 10,000 steps - whilst being most of those things - is not so achievable. Not every day. Not when I'm being honest with myself. 

On the outside I'll be shuffling along in
leggings and a hoody. On the inside,
I'll be doing this.

So I'll say it again. I'm going to walk at least 5000 steps a day. And again?  I'm going to walk at least 5000 steps a day. If I keep telling myself, I might stick to it. And who knows, by making it realistic, and easyish to do, I may well find myself going over 5000, and then who knows where I'll be. Marathon training and shovelling in the bananas before you know it. 

For now, let's remember two things. New Year's resolutions are pointless, and I'm going to walk at least 5000 steps every day. Completely clear and not at all contradictory. (Again, this is how B***s Johnson started.) 

Have a lovely week, folks.